


The Marriage of true minds

by Emily_Targaryen



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, Sherlock-centric, TJLC | The Johnlock Conspiracy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-05
Updated: 2014-11-05
Packaged: 2018-02-24 06:45:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2571971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emily_Targaryen/pseuds/Emily_Targaryen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock looses his memory due to a brain tumour, he forgets his cases, how to play the violin and slowly looses his mind palace, will he remember his one true love, John Watson?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Marriage of true minds

** The marriage of true minds **

****

‘A Brain tumour.

                          In the Temporal Lobe.

                                                            Inoperable.

                                                                               I have 6 months

                                                                                                                 ...

                                                                                                                  ...

                                                                                                                        I’m sorry John.

                                                                                                                 ....

                                                                                                                 ...

          

         

                                                                                                         John

                                                                                              John?

                                                                 Can you hear me?

                                    Say something!

              Anything…

Please!’          

                                                                     

                                                     

 

 

Shocked. I was shocked.

The whole thing was a blur.

I didn’t want to live in a world without him.

A world without Sherlock.

 

 

 

****

**~4 months 29 days and 10 hours~**

‘We should get married’

‘You don’t want that’

‘I love you Sherlock’

‘You love the man I once was’

His eye line trailed down to the floor. He was tapping his fingers in a succinct yet rhythmic fashion.

‘I love the man you are’

I took his hand in mine. His soft touch sent pulses of electricity through my body.

‘I..I..I…

.

.

.

…can’t remember what I was going to say’

‘It’s okay Sherlock, it’s okay’

It wasn’t okay.

That’s when it began, the memory loss.

 

**~3 months 15 days and 7 hours~**

It was a typical February morning in London. Frost on the windows of my Nissan Figaro, cups of coffee and rushed goodbye kisses.

‘I’ll be back normal time, there’s food in the fridge, make sure you let Mrs Hudson know if you pop out or anything… its best we have an idea where you are… in case anything was to happen.’

I hollered towards the bedroom.

I had my briefcase in one hand, coat in the other, about to step out the door.

‘Can I grab a lift Darling?’

He walked out the bedroom in his hand tailored suit. It hadn’t seen the light of day for almost two months.

It was his work suit

‘Where do you think you’re going’

I jested.

‘Work john. I have cases to solve, lives to save.’

In a hurry, He grabbed his winter coat and scarf off the stand, ready to head off for the day.

I paused.

It had been bad before.

But not this bad.

‘Work?’

‘The hospital John! Can you drop me at saint barts or not?’

‘Sherlock…’

I saw the frustration slowly building.

‘…you quit your job, remember?’

‘What? And why exactly would I do that Mr. Smart arse?’

I didn’t say a thing.

I couldn’t say a thing.

‘What’s your problem john? Cat got your tongue? Or have you just realised all the crap that’s coming out your mouth?’

What could I say?

He didn’t know.

It wasn’t his fault.

His intelligence was everything to him.

His knowledge, and the problems it solved, lives it saved and doors it unlocked.

His wisdom, his memory they were all

Slipping

From

His

Clutch.

‘Cancer Sherlock. You have cancer. You quit your job 2 months ago. Your mind and body couldn’t cope with the stress you were under. I’m sorry’

The light behind his eyes softly yet suddenly dimmed.

He realised.

He remembered.

He sighed.

‘…Oh….’

**~2 months 24 days and 2 hours’**

I lowered the needle onto the record and it spun like a maple seed in a harsh gust of wind.

‘Elvis, sure. Why not?’

He smirked. I walked towards him, feeling the coolness of the kitchen tiles on my bare feet.

‘May I have this dance?’

_Wise men say, only fools rush in…_

My arms wrapped around his neck, his around my waist. We moved as one, dancing slowly and steadily. I didn’t want to make him feel dizzy.

_…But I can’t help falling in love with you…_

He rested his head on my shoulder. I buried my face in his chest.

… _Shall I stay? Would it be a sin?..._

Could he tell I was crying?

_…if I can’t help falling in love with you…_

He knew. Of course he knew

_…Like a river flows, surely to the sea…_

He cupped my cheek in his hand. They were cold as ice. But I’d gotten used to that by then

_…Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be…_

I tried to smile, not for myself, for him. He tenderly wiped the tears from under my eyes, returning the smile I gave him.

_…Take my hand, take my whole life too…_

_H_ e gently kissed me, embracing me tighter than ever. I could feel the breath escaping from him. He was weak, weaker than ever. But it was my job to make him feel on top of the world, and I knew that.

_…for I can’t help falling in love with you…_

‘You’re the best husband a man could wish for, you know that?’

Husband…

It hit me like a ton of bricks.

**~1 Month 2 days and 7 hours~**

‘Sherlock! Sherlock

Can

You

Hear

Me

?’

Thank god I refused to let him lock the bathroom door.

‘Sherlock!’

There was steam in the air from the boiling hot shower which was thundering down against the cold tiles of the bathroom floor.  The water was overflowing, he must have slipped.

‘Sherlock!’

…Or had a seizure…

‘Please, stay with me, I’m here, it will be okay.’

The smell, which I hadn’t noticed as I entered the room, suddenly hit me.

Vomit.

He was covered in it, it was a miracle he didn’t choke, I thought to myself.

I grabbed a towel to wipe him down and ran my fingers through his brown curly hair, which always calmed him down. It was then that I noticed…

Blood.

**~29 days 1 hour~**

The hospital walls had become a prison cell. Nowhere to run away from fate, nowhere to hide from it, even if we did escape, our destiny was inevitable.

‘I just went down to the vending machine Sherlock and…’

‘Sherlock…?

Who’s Sherlock?’

‘You’re Sherlock, Sherlock Holmes’

He looked so lost, like a duckling looking for its mother.

‘i..i...who are you?’

My whole life, everything I had, wanted and had worked for shattered around me in that one sentence. Try pieces of crystallized glass falling all around me, and there was no way of putting them back together.

‘I’m John’

A tear trickled down my cheek.

‘I’m your husband’

I smiled and sat on the edge of his bed.

**~28 days 20 hours~**

I told him everything, his life story, my life story and the story of the life we had shared together. I showed him pictures, videos, I even sang him the Elvis song we danced to together on the kitchen tiles, it was the last time he was truly himself.

He was intrigued, fascinated like a small child hearing a fairy tale for the first time.

He wanted to remember but he couldn’t.

He apologised constantly, he was frustrated and furious at himself for not remembering, but was too weak to express it.

 

 

                 Rate                                                                     loosing                                                  …

       Heart        Increased                                      was                  him                                        ….

His                                  the                               I                        but                          too

                                            Noise       piercing                                   I                ready

                                                  Was                                                    wasn’t

 

 

………….……………………………………………………Let go……………………………..........................................

I’ll never forget his famous last words

‘John Watson, you are extraordinary’

**~14 days 6 hours~**

I never thought I’d have to write Sherlocks Eulogy, I always assumed it would be him writing mine.

**~12 days~**

It was a beautiful April morning, still dew on the grass yet the sun was shining bright in the sky. It was shining for Sherlock, I told myself. The funeral was painful. I just about gave the Eulogy without crying. I tried to keep my spirits up, that’s what Sherlock would have wanted.

**~5 days 7 hours~**

I can’t remember what Sobriety is like. I don’t want to remember. I don’t want to do or feel a damned thing.

**~3 days 13 hours~**

I can’t do this

**~ 2 days 8 hours~**

I’m trying to write everything down to feel better about myself but to be honest I feel worse for it.

**~12 hours~**

I miss him

**~4 hours 10 minutes~**

I’m leaving. I’ve got to leave this apartment. These walls ooze Sherlock. I need to go, I need to get away.

**~3 hours 27 minutes~**

It’s nice up here. The view of the London skyline makes me think about how irrelevant all this is, how irrelevant I am.

There are millions of school kids with satchels running down the streets, tripping over pavements and scuffing up their knees.

So many housewives;

Some of them cooking dinner for their husbands to come home too.  Others just trying guess the pin for his 6th credit card, so they can by more things they don’t need and ultimately don’t care about.

All the business men on the tube waiting to come home to their suburban home and happy easygoing families, or their empty bachelor pads or going to the pub for a pint with ‘the lads’.

There are

 Tourists,

Artists,

Doctors,

 Lawyers,

all these people living their separate lives, all with their own issues and problems which I will probably never know about or even care about.

 And they don’t care about mine.

I’m irrelevant to everyone… but Sherlock.  

**~1 hour 18 minutes~**

What even is the point in life without him?

**~5 minutes~**

What if I was to just…

 

 ‘I can’t do this without you .

                                            You were the light of my life.

                                                                                       And you always will be.

                                                                                                                              I love you             

                                                                                                                                                     ...

                                                                                                                                                     ...

                                                                                                                                                            I’m sorry Sherlock.

                                                                                                                                                    ...

                                                                                                                                                   ...          

          

                                                                                                                                 Sherlock?

                                                                                                                  Sherlock?

                                                                            Can you hear me?

                                           Say something!

                    Anything…

  Please!’          

                                                                     

                                                     

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shocked. I am shocked.

The whole thing is a blur.

I can’t live in a world without him.

A world without Sherlock.


End file.
